A Light for my Path
Photo by Dustin Scarpitti
Your word is a lamp to my feet
and a light to my path.
Psalm 119:105
I have often struggled with anxiety over my decisions. What direction should I go? What should I focus on? Who should I be friends with? What does God want me to do? I was terrified of ruining God’s plan for my life.
Then one day this verse stood out to me in a completely different way.
Your word is a lamp for my feet
I only need to see the next step. That’s it. I don’t need to know the second or third, just the next one in front of me. What does fruitfulness look like with what God has given me today?
Oftentimes it is the small and mundane that God wants us to steward faithfully and intentionally. Serving our coworker, cleaning our space, and seeking the best interest of the customer who is getting on our nerves.
A light for my path
This is the part that gets hard for people. What’s the big plan? Where do I fit? What’s the big thing that I am meant to accomplish with my life?
Friend, we are to pursue righteousness.
But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.
Matthew 6:33
As we pursue righteousness and serving those around us, we are able to notice what we’re good at. Are you good with people? Are you good with organization? Are you a visual creative? (I am!)
As you notice how God has designed you, you will recognize what opportunities are a good fit for you. Maybe God will give you ideas of ways you and others could serve more effectively.
Notice the ideas God gives you.
An idea from God is one that sticks around. You think about it all the time and can’t ignore it. Maybe it’s impossibly out of reach. Those are His favorite.
On March 24th, 2009, God asked me to let go of the pursuit of professional ballet. He had led me into dance and now He was leading me away. I was terribly confused, to say the least.
I had already filmed Blue Dress and knew that I preferred making personal work over collaborating with others. (And as it turns out, being a professional dancer means that you are collaborating with a choreographer by submitting to their vision. In hindsight, I very thankful God did not ask me to do this!)
March 24th, 2009, I received a rejection letter from the only dance company I would consider working with. (Very closed minded of me, but I knew I didn’t want to collaborate just anyone!) So I sat on my bed in my room trying to accept this massive shift in my life’s direction.
And a word picture became a story.
Our bible study had been talking about forgiveness. And I made an observation about how the tighter we hold onto bitterness, the more it cuts into us. The phrase had stuck with me, but that night it became something more: the word picture became a story.
Many years have past and I’ve always wondered when the right time would be to dance this story.
Then 2016 happened.
I had hot flashes and nutritional deficiencies and I walked over to my neighbor’s house crying because I was struggling to hold onto my will to live. I was too exhausted to create anything, much less even think about going to ballet class. Out of desperation, I asked for watercolors that Christmas.
And so Inverse Dream Art was born. And I pushed forward with faithfulness in illustrating the truths that God had given me.
And then it happened again.
The word picture that became a story all those years ago decided that it needed to be a graphic novel.
I don’t know how I’m going to create this. The warfare is going to be absolute hell. I will be fighting bitterness like my life depends on it.
But I know what direction I am meant to go. And I will keep walking.
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